It's official; Ivan hates me.
So I've been dealing with an ongoing sense of TONY STARK HOW SO DAMAGED from both other people's fic and how he behaves in my head in fic I might be writing (note to tony: no steve is not pissed off about you maybe banging lady gaga because he is jealous; I promise you that is not it, tony). Both ![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
niqaeli and I keep retreating to the Losers for sanity because THOSE guys are so much less damaged. I am not kidding and wow what.
I have been poking around in the back of my head for Ivan, who went to ground months ago and keeps jumping fandoms to avoid me. After the time I found him in New York, I decided not to ask at all when I tagged him in Chicago. Ivan Vorpatril is the most active, independent character in my head, and pretty much the only one who recognizes my presence as a writer and to be slunk away from.
Anyway, I hunted him up and begged him to come back because omg less damaged than Tony fucking Stark and he looked around at my crop of plotbunnies and got pissed off at me because we have a plotbunny called the goddamn lunar base whose sole purpose is a Tony without damage for me to use to block regular Tony out. All the things I've done to Ivan but Tony gets a happyverse? And I said we'd sort of done that for, well, not for Ivan specifically, but for Vorkosiganverse, we have a massive AU where we fixed the Escobar war and stuff and Padma is alive and Ivan had both parents growing up (and no need to mention That Time He Was Emperor for 5 minutes) and is a diplomat and engaged to René Vorbretten!
And Ivan looked right at me and said, "You're not nice."
Muses.
niqaeli and I keep retreating to the Losers for sanity because THOSE guys are so much less damaged. I am not kidding and wow what.I have been poking around in the back of my head for Ivan, who went to ground months ago and keeps jumping fandoms to avoid me. After the time I found him in New York, I decided not to ask at all when I tagged him in Chicago. Ivan Vorpatril is the most active, independent character in my head, and pretty much the only one who recognizes my presence as a writer and to be slunk away from.
Anyway, I hunted him up and begged him to come back because omg less damaged than Tony fucking Stark and he looked around at my crop of plotbunnies and got pissed off at me because we have a plotbunny called the goddamn lunar base whose sole purpose is a Tony without damage for me to use to block regular Tony out. All the things I've done to Ivan but Tony gets a happyverse? And I said we'd sort of done that for, well, not for Ivan specifically, but for Vorkosiganverse, we have a massive AU where we fixed the Escobar war and stuff and Padma is alive and Ivan had both parents growing up (and no need to mention That Time He Was Emperor for 5 minutes) and is a diplomat and engaged to René Vorbretten!
And Ivan looked right at me and said, "You're not nice."
Muses.
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*spontaneously turns into a cheerleader for that fic*
I'll trade you the one I've never written that, through random shenanigans, Ivan's the Vorkosigan heir and marries Laisa?
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Parts of Diplomatic Relations 'verse are so weird and unpredictable to niq & I that the only way we can get any read on them is to open up wormhole shenanigans and dump a regular Miles and Ivan through for comparison purposes. Regular Ivan is creeped all to hell by the version of himself from this universe, not least because their "Ivan" is not totally genetically the same as him; one of those random vagaries of genetic inheritance at a different moment combined with how the moment of his conception was in fact five years earlier. (Serg was out of the picture pretty much immediately after Gregor's birth. Alys and Padma did not find themselves going "hmm maybe we should wait until things are more um settled to start a family...")
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He got a lot of fucking therapy actually, because awful things happened to and around him. Five year old Ivan was the child rescue op, not Miles. (Miles does not, actually, exist in Diplomatic Relations. No Escobar means no replicators means no saving the pregnancy. The eldest Vorkosigan is Mark Pierre, and he is genetically a different person altogether.)
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Oh, ouch. *hugs Ivan*
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Oh, man. I bet regular!Miles, when run through the DR!universe, finds that horrifyingly creepy.
Imagine a universe in which there is no Miles at all to impress people and save people and
give Simon giant headachestake care of the Dendarii folk and just generally outshine anyone ever.It'd be like that holiday movie I've never seen all of... only instead of a bunch of neighbours being sad you didn't exist, entire planets would have histories you didn't recognise.
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DR!Ivan's reaction to hearing they work/ed for Illyan, head of freaking ImpSec, is... VIOLENT. "And I suppose Ges Vorrutyer's a goddamn saint in your universe?" "...um, no. He died during Escobar, actually Lady Vorkosigan killed him when she was a prisoner." "Well, I'll believe that, at least."
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Although I suppose you can argue we did crack him because by the end he hasn't much of Illyan left. Still sane, but not someone Illyan (wee!Illyan or elder!Illyan, either) would recognise. :/
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And Ivan looked right at me and said, "You're not nice.
Awwwww! Come on, Ivan, who wouldn't want to be engaged to Rene Vorbretten?! I want to be engaged to Rene Vorbretten! He's a musician; I bet his hands are very talented! Also I'm pretty sure he's gorgeous all over, because Ceta gengineering standards of the last few generations shares oddly similar beauty standards with Barrayar!
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