woe is me, pity me

[jmtorres]

So my life has been very a) busy and b) sucky of late. I want fic to cheer me up. I even have a good long fic open to curl up with when I have sufficient spare time to do so. Time is something I have none of.

Would anyone like to write me comment fic? I might have time to read comment fic. (Probably. DW comment lengths being what they are, I do say probably. *laugh*)

I want to read about secret agent Ivan Vorpatril, whose agentness is actually secret, unlike Miles'. I asked the question, what would have happened to Ivan if any adult had seen through the Ivan-you-idiot act when he was young? Then I asked, what if that adult was Illyan? And yes. Ivan, Simon's pet spy. I am beginning to regard this as canon and write in Ivan's adventures around the margins of Miles'.

I want niqaeli's Ivan-runs-away-to-join-the-circus fic. I do I do I do.

I love Gregor being Imperial at people. Like, my favorite thing in that entire universe is Gregor being quietly, intensely good at his job. Last night I opened up Civil Campaign and skipped straight to the scene where he talks to Nikki. And then past the intervening plot chapter to when Nikki brings Impsec down on the house. I think I may go read the back half of Vor Game in my copious spare time next.

I er, seem to have fallen headfirst into Vorkosiganverse again.

I am also interested in Being Human fic. Though I would like them slightly snarkier than portrayed on television. I want threesome. They are adorable. Really truly they are. I want the story of--ha, I've forgotten their names again. I want the story of McBroody and Geekface going house-shopping and how they decided to move into Ghostie's flat. And whether they were of one mind about the wisdom of that, and how broken she was before anyone who could see her showed up.

If this is too limiting, if you don't know any of these sources, know that parts of my brain have shut down in attempted cope, but--

Old fandoms may be reopened with comment fic. And it is possible that if you write me a scene I might be inspired to write you one in reply.

Comments

[gisho]

That ... is about the best idea ever and I'm kind of afraid I wouldn't be able to do it justice, but I'll see what I can do. What kind of adventures were you envisioning? The only thing that springs to mind would be 'he's actually at the Earth embassy to uncover a secret Cetagandan plot', and now I can't think of a plausible Cetagandan plot ...

[azurelunatic]

This is a re-tread of Ivan-meets-Dono, with the premise that Ivan is an agent. Dialogue and blocking are lifted from the original scene.


~*~


Ivan's brain was spinning in the vacuum left by his rapidly-departed libido. He could feel it spinning in his head as he tried to clutch after what remained of his sanity. He let the information pour in, not even trying to collate it all.

Alarm shocked through him, polarizing the vapor of information collecting in the bottom of his mind. Gregor. "Does Gregor know about this?" Ivan demanded. "Did you tell him your plan, before you left for Beta?" This would not be the first time Gregor had played his agents blind against each other, not blindfolded but double-blind. Although it would be a scheme of Milesian fiendishness to knowingly set Ivan unprepared into ... this. Whatever it was to become.

"No, of course not," Dono said, dismissing Ivan's worst fears. Byerly flicked a glance at Ivan, then twitched his head slightly. No.

Ivan bit his teeth on the sort of extended, cover-blowing rant that would get him cashiered and relegated to the tedium of his supposed position. "Are you out of your minds?" he asked instead.

Dono's logic would have been sound if only this had been anyone but Gregor. Ivan tore at his hair and explained, in the smallest words he could find, exactly how bad an idea this would be. Without blowing his cover. Without asking Byerly if he was in fact the agent Ivan suspected he was. At least they had started to listen to reason. Ivan calmed.

"Can you get us in?" Dono asked.

Ivan stammered. He had been called in as an observer, damn them, charged to discover, assess, and report on the wayward Lady Donna's activities in the absence of any more detailed reports emerging from her stay on Beta Colony. Personal involvement could be ... messy.

"Tomorrow?" Dono pressed. "Morning?"

Ivan caved. "I'll... see what I can do," he mumbled, knowing that Dono would correctly hear the pledge of his name's word in that breath.

"Thank you!" Dono beamed, and despite himself, Ivan felt his cock twitch. Oh, Donna.

Mercifully, he was let go, shuttled safely home with a Vorrutyer car and driver. He could finally think, out of Dono's damnably distracting presence.

As Gregor's liegeman, he owed the Emperor a true and complete report. As Donna's -- Dono's ... whatever they were, he supposed he owed Dono the chance to make true and first confession to their Emperor. He shuffled through his handful of blank security cards, first setting aside his personal card, then his new-minted Captain's card, and finally set aside the scrambler card he used for his reports. He reluctantly produced the other scrambler card.

Even at this level of direct access, the call did not route straight to Gregor. Gregor's bland-faced man was in civvies, but he was known to Ivan. "I would like to speak to Gregor, please," Ivan said. It was too late to back out now.

The man looked at his screen a second time. "Excuse me, Lord Vorpatril, but did you mean to use this channel?" he asked, stressing 'Lord' slightly.

Ivan set his chin. "Yes."

Gregor's man registered surprise, but put him through to make his report. Confession. Whichever. Ivan washed his hands of it.

[jmtorres]

Heh. I am hopeful that perhaps it can be written in dribs and drabs, by many people. I have... three scenes in my head, azurelunatic has written one, and perhaps we'll be inspired to more (and inspire other people!).

I can't think of anything to advise you re Cetagandan plot but I am highly amused by Ivan being constantly out of pocket on Earth driving Galeni nuts. Of course his excuse is sex. It's such a *plausible* excuse--it's true most of the time, because it's such a very useful way to snoop!

[jmtorres]

Oh. Oh my. Oh Ivan. The personal favor keycard versus the secret report keycard! And the tearing his hair out not to reveal himself! *heart*

[azurelunatic]

I figure the first one is personal favors, second is cover story business, third is real business, and fourth is a higher level of hush-hush for Gregor's Personal Entrusted Parties: the alarums/excursions all the way on up to slit-your-throat-before-reading and reports of treason at the highest levels. For things the military, even spies in the military, shouldn't be touching. You know.

Miles, of course, uses it all the time because he's up past his hyperactive ears in it, and also because he's not an official spy so they never gave him a spy card, and Miles likes the dramatics of using that channel even if it's not strictly burn-before-reading.