daily writing (studio 60)
You know, I had the unholy suspicion that the vividcon deadline was going to be great for my word count. 1879 words. Spoilers through K&R, I suppose (not the finale, hadn't seen it yet, watching it... now); inspired by this bunny of
niqaeli's *cries*, Matt and Jordan. Also on AO3.
That only cost me about four and a half hours!
In the hallway outside Jordan's hospital room, Matt took a nervous step back, and Danny caught his arm and pushed him forward.
"Matt. She asked to see you," Danny reminded him.
"But she knows, she heard about the--" Matt waved his free arm, since Danny was still holding onto one.
"Yeah, and Harriet said she thinks it's funny," Danny reassured him.
"Harriet says, Harriet says, what did Jordan say to you?" Matt asked.
"Hey," said Jordan said, leaning forward to see him around the doorframe. "Is that you, you boyfriend-stealing whore?"
Matt blinked, and jerked his head towards Danny. "Is she talking to me?"
"Pretty sure she is, yeah," Danny said. He didn't let go of Matt's arm when Matt tried to pull away again. "Dry humor. It's her thing."
"She keeps thinking she's funny, she's not funny," Matt muttered.
"She's not a professional, don't hold it against her," Danny answered. "This is what she told me, okay?" And he leaned in and kissed Matt.
Matt held still out of surprise for one breath, and two, and then when he started to lean in, Danny pulled back and broke off. "The hell?" Matt asked softly.
"She said it wasn't fair that it happened where she didn't get to see it," Danny said. He gave Matt a shove to the door. "You're on."
"Come in, sit down," Jordan called. She was grinning, but she seemed to be grinning at the baby in her arms, not at Matt.
Danny shut the door behind Matt, propelling him into the room. "Uh, okay," Matt said, glancing back through the glass. Danny leaned on the door, his back to Matt. Matt took a step toward the chair by the window.
"No, come here and sit down," Jordan said, patting the bed. When she moved her arm it became apparent that she was not merely cradling the baby, she was breastfeeding.
"Okay," Matt said, coming to a stop with his hands in his pockets.
"Matthew," Jordan said, rolling her eyes.
Matt sat down. "Can you actually say 'whore' in front of a baby?" he asked.
"I've decided that instead of censoring myself, I'm just going to teach her how to swear appropriately," Jordan announced.
"I'm sure that's going to make her preschool teacher very happy when she calls little Amy a whore on the playground," Matt said.
"I'm imagining it'll cost me nannies first," Jordan sighed.
"Are we," Matt gestured between them, "okay? I mean, you know, I'm not trying to steal him back--"
"We're okay," Jordan interrupted.
"--but if you wanted me to, you know, never speak to you again," Matt offered, "I'd be up for that."
"Are we okay?" Jordan asked. "Because you seem slightly not okay."
"I was being generous!" Matt protested.
"Never speak to me again?" Jordan asked, eyebrows up. "And how would that work, exactly?"
"Well, I'm pretty sure I've found the best ever go-between for the show and the network," Matt suggested. "I think you've met him?"
"And what are you going to do at the wedding?" Jordan asked. "I really don't think the best man can get through the ceremony and the reception without saying a word to the bride."
"You guys are actually having a wedding? That you want people there for?" Matt asked.
"Matt. I know it's not your forte, but could you be serious for five minutes?" Jordan requested.
"I am being serious," said Matt. "The last time Danny got married, he went to the Elvis chapel while I was at the blackjack table."
"Seriously?" Jordan said, looking interested.
"Seriously!" Matt answered. "I asked him if he could look after himself for half an hour and sat down to play some cards, and he comes back three sheets to the wind--and I do not know how he managed that so fast, because he was sober when I turned him loose, I'd been taking every drink those casino cocktail waitresses gave him--this was after the coke, before Harriet--it seemed important to him that he stay completely clean, even though all I was really worried about was stuff he could snort, sniff or smoke--but so he shows up completely drunk, hanging off this poor besequinned girl's arm, right, and says, 'Hey, Matty, I want you to meet my new wife.'"
"Oh, no," Jordan said. "Besequinned?"
"Showgirl," Matt said. "Fantail, fishnets, the works. Are you sure it's okay for me to tell this story in front of the baby?"
"The baby doesn't have any idea what you're saying, she's two days old," said Jordan. "What did you say?"
Matt sighed. No, the rest of it was entertaining, too, and it wasn't even that he couldn't laugh at himself--he could happily invite other people to laugh at him, even!--but he'd hoped to avoid mentioning him and Danny screwing again. "I said, 'But I thought I was your new wife!' and got into a catfight with her."
"A catfight," Jordan said.
"Screaming, hair pulling, clawing, clothes-ripping, the whole nine yards," Matt answered. "Then she kneed me in the balls and I spent an hour at a security station with an ice pack while Danny and the showgirl went and made the marriage unannulable. The resultant divorce lasted two weeks, and he got her not to take him for every penny he had by promising her a job where she didn't have to take her clothes off as often in Hollywood, which is how Jeannie Whatley-Tripp got an interview with Wes and got hired for Studio 60."
"What? Jeannie?" Jordan said. "You're kidding!"
"I am, in fact, completely serious," Matt said, smiling a little.
"How come I'd never heard any of this?" Jordan demanded.
"Because no one gossips like Jeannie and Jeannie gossips about everyone else's misfortunes to keep your eye off of hers," Matt said. "Well, that's the reason you didn't hear it from Jeannie, directly or indirectly. I can only assume the reason you didn't hear it from Danny was he was trying to put his best foot forward. But you can come ask me for the dirt on Danny any time, I will be happy to rat him out."
"I'll bet," said Jordan. "Anything to scare me off, huh?"
"I would never," said Matt.
"How serious were you," Jordan asked, "when you said you thought you were Danny's new wife?"
"Oh, you know," Matt said, rocking his hand rapidly in a nervous fifty-fifty gesture, "seventy-five, eighty percent joking. Yeah, we were screwing at the time, but I knew that was just, sort of, being a good friend after Cathy, the first wife--"
"Yeah, I've heard about Cathy," Jordan said.
"If I'd really been a good friend, I probably wouldn't have left him alone long enough to get wasted, take in a show, meet the performers, and marry one of them," Matt reflected.
The baby let go of Jordan's breast to cry. Matt congratulated on not having looked a whole lot until his gaze was drawn. Jordan shushed her daughter softly, shifting her arms, and finally said, "Matt, could you stop that?"
"Huh?" Matt looked down to where Jordan had jerked her chin. His knee was bouncing rapidly with nervous energy. "Oh. Sorry." He made himself be still and put his hand on his knee so he'd notice if he started up again.
"So are you thinking that if you were a really good friend, you wouldn't let him marry me?" Jordan asked, switching the baby over to the other breast.
"I, uh," said Matt. "No, I mean, I've tried to be supportive. You don't know about this because he winged it, but I was actually writing the proposal for him. It was going to be awesome. Self-deprecating, devoted, entertaining, adoring--"
"Sincere?" Jordan asked.
"Well, that's in the performance, not the writing," Matt said. "Not, not my area. So. Wedding. Real thing. Not five minutes in front of the justice of the peace?"
Jordan gave him a long look. "Yes, the real thing. Probably not a church wedding, since I was raised Catholic and they didn't recognize my divorce."
"White wedding?" Matt asked obnoxiously.
"I think that would be a little disingenuous, don't you?" Jordan said. "Especially since Danny asked me if I wanted to carry the baby down the aisle and stick 'husband and father' in the vows."
"Yeah, he's... really sweet on her, isn't he?" Matt asked, looking down at the baby, biting his lip to try not to smile unreservedly. "Have you named her yet?"
"Danny and I are in negotiations," Jordan said. "His first pitch was Matthewina. I'm choosing to assume he was joking."
"God, I hope so," Matt said. "That's horrifying."
"That he wants to name my baby after his ex-boyfriend?" Jordan asked.
But she was grinning, so Matt grinned back and said, "Be careful who you're calling ex, lady, we're still partners."
"I said I might consider Madeleine," Jordan said, looking down at her baby, with a careful glance up at Matt, "and that he could call her Maddy if he wanted."
"Huh," said Matt. "Well, it's not Matthewina. What was he thinking?"
"I don't know!" Jordan said, half laughing. "I think it was just the first thing that popped into his head when he decided naming her for you would declare his split allegiances, and then he just--"
"Stuck with it, because he's stubborn and stupid," Matt said. "Thank you for not giving in, that would be a horrible thing to do to the little girl who's... apparently going to be my namesake anyway. Were either of you going to ask me?"
"Were you going to ask me if you could make out with my fiancé?" Jordan asked.
"I was... going to ask your forgiveness?" Matt suggested lamely.
Jordan snickered. "Whore."
"Tramp," Matt shot back.
"Bitch," Jordan said, grinning.
"Tart."
"Cocksucker."
"Harlot."
"You're going to lose if you won't use words you don't want to say in front of a baby," Jordan warned him.
"My vocabulary is vast," Matt said, spreading his arms. "You're going to lose if you don't use anything but the seven dirty words."
"Get out of here," said Jordan, kicking his leg through the covers. "Send Danny in."
Matt stood, hands shoved in his pockets. "We okay?"
"We're good," Jordan said. "But I told you that to begin with. Are you okay?"
"Oh, I'm fine," Matt said. "Hell, I'm friends with Jeannie now, believe it or not."
"Oh, I have heard about your friendship with Jeannie," Jordan said.
Matt grinned and turned to the door. "Don't believe everything Harriet says about me." He pushed the door open and said to Danny, "She wants you."
"Cunt," called Jordan.
"Trollop!" Matt called back over his shoulder.
Danny frowned at him. "You know you lost that one, right?"
Matt shrugged. "I know. So?" Better to lose gracefully.
"Okay," said Danny, eyebrows still up.
"Get in there," said Matt. As Danny brushed past him, Matt couldn't resist adding, "Matthewina. Idiot."
![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
That only cost me about four and a half hours!
In the hallway outside Jordan's hospital room, Matt took a nervous step back, and Danny caught his arm and pushed him forward.
"Matt. She asked to see you," Danny reminded him.
"But she knows, she heard about the--" Matt waved his free arm, since Danny was still holding onto one.
"Yeah, and Harriet said she thinks it's funny," Danny reassured him.
"Harriet says, Harriet says, what did Jordan say to you?" Matt asked.
"Hey," said Jordan said, leaning forward to see him around the doorframe. "Is that you, you boyfriend-stealing whore?"
Matt blinked, and jerked his head towards Danny. "Is she talking to me?"
"Pretty sure she is, yeah," Danny said. He didn't let go of Matt's arm when Matt tried to pull away again. "Dry humor. It's her thing."
"She keeps thinking she's funny, she's not funny," Matt muttered.
"She's not a professional, don't hold it against her," Danny answered. "This is what she told me, okay?" And he leaned in and kissed Matt.
Matt held still out of surprise for one breath, and two, and then when he started to lean in, Danny pulled back and broke off. "The hell?" Matt asked softly.
"She said it wasn't fair that it happened where she didn't get to see it," Danny said. He gave Matt a shove to the door. "You're on."
"Come in, sit down," Jordan called. She was grinning, but she seemed to be grinning at the baby in her arms, not at Matt.
Danny shut the door behind Matt, propelling him into the room. "Uh, okay," Matt said, glancing back through the glass. Danny leaned on the door, his back to Matt. Matt took a step toward the chair by the window.
"No, come here and sit down," Jordan said, patting the bed. When she moved her arm it became apparent that she was not merely cradling the baby, she was breastfeeding.
"Okay," Matt said, coming to a stop with his hands in his pockets.
"Matthew," Jordan said, rolling her eyes.
Matt sat down. "Can you actually say 'whore' in front of a baby?" he asked.
"I've decided that instead of censoring myself, I'm just going to teach her how to swear appropriately," Jordan announced.
"I'm sure that's going to make her preschool teacher very happy when she calls little Amy a whore on the playground," Matt said.
"I'm imagining it'll cost me nannies first," Jordan sighed.
"Are we," Matt gestured between them, "okay? I mean, you know, I'm not trying to steal him back--"
"We're okay," Jordan interrupted.
"--but if you wanted me to, you know, never speak to you again," Matt offered, "I'd be up for that."
"Are we okay?" Jordan asked. "Because you seem slightly not okay."
"I was being generous!" Matt protested.
"Never speak to me again?" Jordan asked, eyebrows up. "And how would that work, exactly?"
"Well, I'm pretty sure I've found the best ever go-between for the show and the network," Matt suggested. "I think you've met him?"
"And what are you going to do at the wedding?" Jordan asked. "I really don't think the best man can get through the ceremony and the reception without saying a word to the bride."
"You guys are actually having a wedding? That you want people there for?" Matt asked.
"Matt. I know it's not your forte, but could you be serious for five minutes?" Jordan requested.
"I am being serious," said Matt. "The last time Danny got married, he went to the Elvis chapel while I was at the blackjack table."
"Seriously?" Jordan said, looking interested.
"Seriously!" Matt answered. "I asked him if he could look after himself for half an hour and sat down to play some cards, and he comes back three sheets to the wind--and I do not know how he managed that so fast, because he was sober when I turned him loose, I'd been taking every drink those casino cocktail waitresses gave him--this was after the coke, before Harriet--it seemed important to him that he stay completely clean, even though all I was really worried about was stuff he could snort, sniff or smoke--but so he shows up completely drunk, hanging off this poor besequinned girl's arm, right, and says, 'Hey, Matty, I want you to meet my new wife.'"
"Oh, no," Jordan said. "Besequinned?"
"Showgirl," Matt said. "Fantail, fishnets, the works. Are you sure it's okay for me to tell this story in front of the baby?"
"The baby doesn't have any idea what you're saying, she's two days old," said Jordan. "What did you say?"
Matt sighed. No, the rest of it was entertaining, too, and it wasn't even that he couldn't laugh at himself--he could happily invite other people to laugh at him, even!--but he'd hoped to avoid mentioning him and Danny screwing again. "I said, 'But I thought I was your new wife!' and got into a catfight with her."
"A catfight," Jordan said.
"Screaming, hair pulling, clawing, clothes-ripping, the whole nine yards," Matt answered. "Then she kneed me in the balls and I spent an hour at a security station with an ice pack while Danny and the showgirl went and made the marriage unannulable. The resultant divorce lasted two weeks, and he got her not to take him for every penny he had by promising her a job where she didn't have to take her clothes off as often in Hollywood, which is how Jeannie Whatley-Tripp got an interview with Wes and got hired for Studio 60."
"What? Jeannie?" Jordan said. "You're kidding!"
"I am, in fact, completely serious," Matt said, smiling a little.
"How come I'd never heard any of this?" Jordan demanded.
"Because no one gossips like Jeannie and Jeannie gossips about everyone else's misfortunes to keep your eye off of hers," Matt said. "Well, that's the reason you didn't hear it from Jeannie, directly or indirectly. I can only assume the reason you didn't hear it from Danny was he was trying to put his best foot forward. But you can come ask me for the dirt on Danny any time, I will be happy to rat him out."
"I'll bet," said Jordan. "Anything to scare me off, huh?"
"I would never," said Matt.
"How serious were you," Jordan asked, "when you said you thought you were Danny's new wife?"
"Oh, you know," Matt said, rocking his hand rapidly in a nervous fifty-fifty gesture, "seventy-five, eighty percent joking. Yeah, we were screwing at the time, but I knew that was just, sort of, being a good friend after Cathy, the first wife--"
"Yeah, I've heard about Cathy," Jordan said.
"If I'd really been a good friend, I probably wouldn't have left him alone long enough to get wasted, take in a show, meet the performers, and marry one of them," Matt reflected.
The baby let go of Jordan's breast to cry. Matt congratulated on not having looked a whole lot until his gaze was drawn. Jordan shushed her daughter softly, shifting her arms, and finally said, "Matt, could you stop that?"
"Huh?" Matt looked down to where Jordan had jerked her chin. His knee was bouncing rapidly with nervous energy. "Oh. Sorry." He made himself be still and put his hand on his knee so he'd notice if he started up again.
"So are you thinking that if you were a really good friend, you wouldn't let him marry me?" Jordan asked, switching the baby over to the other breast.
"I, uh," said Matt. "No, I mean, I've tried to be supportive. You don't know about this because he winged it, but I was actually writing the proposal for him. It was going to be awesome. Self-deprecating, devoted, entertaining, adoring--"
"Sincere?" Jordan asked.
"Well, that's in the performance, not the writing," Matt said. "Not, not my area. So. Wedding. Real thing. Not five minutes in front of the justice of the peace?"
Jordan gave him a long look. "Yes, the real thing. Probably not a church wedding, since I was raised Catholic and they didn't recognize my divorce."
"White wedding?" Matt asked obnoxiously.
"I think that would be a little disingenuous, don't you?" Jordan said. "Especially since Danny asked me if I wanted to carry the baby down the aisle and stick 'husband and father' in the vows."
"Yeah, he's... really sweet on her, isn't he?" Matt asked, looking down at the baby, biting his lip to try not to smile unreservedly. "Have you named her yet?"
"Danny and I are in negotiations," Jordan said. "His first pitch was Matthewina. I'm choosing to assume he was joking."
"God, I hope so," Matt said. "That's horrifying."
"That he wants to name my baby after his ex-boyfriend?" Jordan asked.
But she was grinning, so Matt grinned back and said, "Be careful who you're calling ex, lady, we're still partners."
"I said I might consider Madeleine," Jordan said, looking down at her baby, with a careful glance up at Matt, "and that he could call her Maddy if he wanted."
"Huh," said Matt. "Well, it's not Matthewina. What was he thinking?"
"I don't know!" Jordan said, half laughing. "I think it was just the first thing that popped into his head when he decided naming her for you would declare his split allegiances, and then he just--"
"Stuck with it, because he's stubborn and stupid," Matt said. "Thank you for not giving in, that would be a horrible thing to do to the little girl who's... apparently going to be my namesake anyway. Were either of you going to ask me?"
"Were you going to ask me if you could make out with my fiancé?" Jordan asked.
"I was... going to ask your forgiveness?" Matt suggested lamely.
Jordan snickered. "Whore."
"Tramp," Matt shot back.
"Bitch," Jordan said, grinning.
"Tart."
"Cocksucker."
"Harlot."
"You're going to lose if you won't use words you don't want to say in front of a baby," Jordan warned him.
"My vocabulary is vast," Matt said, spreading his arms. "You're going to lose if you don't use anything but the seven dirty words."
"Get out of here," said Jordan, kicking his leg through the covers. "Send Danny in."
Matt stood, hands shoved in his pockets. "We okay?"
"We're good," Jordan said. "But I told you that to begin with. Are you okay?"
"Oh, I'm fine," Matt said. "Hell, I'm friends with Jeannie now, believe it or not."
"Oh, I have heard about your friendship with Jeannie," Jordan said.
Matt grinned and turned to the door. "Don't believe everything Harriet says about me." He pushed the door open and said to Danny, "She wants you."
"Cunt," called Jordan.
"Trollop!" Matt called back over his shoulder.
Danny frowned at him. "You know you lost that one, right?"
Matt shrugged. "I know. So?" Better to lose gracefully.
"Okay," said Danny, eyebrows still up.
"Get in there," said Matt. As Danny brushed past him, Matt couldn't resist adding, "Matthewina. Idiot."