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Entry tags:
daily writing (Life on Mars)
808 words from an AU I am calling the Sap Fic of Dooooom, because if things like this happened to actual Sam, the universe would implode or something, but it doesn't because this is sap fic. The Sap Fic of Doooooooooom.
---
Sam spent most of the morning avoiding his boy self, running in and out of the house with boxes yelling, "Make way, make way," and never slowing down long enough to talk. But after he finished unloading the second car load (time for another trip back to Annie's old flat) he had to stop to catch his breath, leaning on the bonnet of the car, and that was when the boy Sam caught up with him.
"Are you going to be my new dad?" he asked.
Sam stared for a moment, breathing hard, bent forward with his hands on his knees. He let his head drop, trying to formulate an answer. "No," he said. "Why do you think you need a new dad? Old one not good enough?"
"He ran off, didn't he?" the boy Sam said petulantly. "You chased him off."
"I did not," Sam said.
"You said you were going to find him, and then he never came back," the boy Sam insisted.
"Well, I can't be your new dad, you're not moving in with me," Sam said, trying another tack. "Clearly, Annie's your new dad, isn't she?"
"Annie can't be my dad, she's a girl," the boy Sam pointed out.
"Then she's your new mum," Sam said, folding his arms and feeling very proud of himself. "Your extra-special secondary back-up mum." He remembered, in that weird, duplicate history, how it had stung when the other schoolboys said he had two mums. Maybe it'd be different if he heard it somewhere else first, from a smiling face.
"Does that mean I have to mind her?" the boy Sam asked.
"Yes, it does," Sam said judiciously. "Just like your own mum, eh?"
The boy Sam wrinkled his nose. He asked, "Are you Annie's boyfriend, then?"
"No," Sam said. He could see the boy Sam was trying to figure out where he fit in. My Other Mum's Boyfriend was a bit unwieldy a title, but it least it would have made sense of things. "I work with Annie. She's a police constable and I'm a detective inspector." Sam could see that wasn't going to be quite enough. "And she's my friend."
"If she's your friend and she's a girl, that means she's your girlfriend," the boy Sam announced with the impeccable logic of four-year-olds.
"No, it doesn't," Sam said, grinning in spite himself.
"Yes, it does."
"Nope." Sam shook his head. "Annie!" he called out.
Annie put her head out the front door. "Yeah?" she asked.
"You my girlfriend, Annie?" Sam said.
"Lord, no, I'd never let myself be saddled with a nutter like you," Annie answered. She came out of the house to lean on the street lamp.
"Then how did you make him help us move and all," asked the boy Sam, "if he's not your boyfriend?"
"I told him he should be grateful I hadn't had him shipped off to the loony bin, didn't I," Annie said. "You heading back?" she asked Sam.
"Yeah, last load, I think," Sam said. "Do you want to come along, make sure I've got everything?"
"I suppose I'd better," said Annie. "Go on back in the house, Sam. Your mum's unpacking the kitchen. I'm sure she could use your help."
The boy Sam heaved a great sigh and kicked a rock. "Can't I come along, too?"
"Won't be room," Annie said. "We're putting boxes in the back."
"Remember what I said," said Sam, nodding toward Annie.
The boy Sam stuck his tongue out and said, "I don't see why I have to mind her if she's only my secondary, back-up mum."
"Your extra-special secondary back-up mum," Sam reminded him. Annie was blushing. "Off you go."
The boy Sam headed into the house, calling out, "Mum, do I really have to mind Annie?"
Annie took a deep breath, squaring her shoulders. "That wasn't so scary, was it? Though why you decided to put me in the hot seat..."
"He thinks of me as the man who chased off his dad," Sam said quietly.
Annie nodded. "It was for the best, Sam."
"I know," Sam said. "You'll be a much better dad than he was."
"I don't know where you get those funny ideas of yours," said Annie. "And I hope this don't mean you think of me as your dad, or mum, or whatever, because there's crazy and then there's daft, you know."
"Whatever you say, Mum," Sam said brightly.
"Sam!" Annie yelled, smacking him on the shoulder.
Sam ducked his head and grinned at her, part cheeky, part shy. "Look at this way, you can make me mind, now."
"Oh, can I," said Annie. "Get in the car, Sam."
"Yes, Mum," said Sam, opening the door.
"Don't call me that, Sam!" Annie got in as well.
"Yes, Mum."
"If you start this up at the station I'll slap you about harder than DCI Hunt."
"Yes, Mum," Sam sing-songed merrily.
Annie leaned her elbow on the open window and fingered her hair. "Anyone would think you were four and he was the grown-up," she said.
"Yes, Mum," Sam said. After all, she was smiling.
Also on AO3.
---
Sam spent most of the morning avoiding his boy self, running in and out of the house with boxes yelling, "Make way, make way," and never slowing down long enough to talk. But after he finished unloading the second car load (time for another trip back to Annie's old flat) he had to stop to catch his breath, leaning on the bonnet of the car, and that was when the boy Sam caught up with him.
"Are you going to be my new dad?" he asked.
Sam stared for a moment, breathing hard, bent forward with his hands on his knees. He let his head drop, trying to formulate an answer. "No," he said. "Why do you think you need a new dad? Old one not good enough?"
"He ran off, didn't he?" the boy Sam said petulantly. "You chased him off."
"I did not," Sam said.
"You said you were going to find him, and then he never came back," the boy Sam insisted.
"Well, I can't be your new dad, you're not moving in with me," Sam said, trying another tack. "Clearly, Annie's your new dad, isn't she?"
"Annie can't be my dad, she's a girl," the boy Sam pointed out.
"Then she's your new mum," Sam said, folding his arms and feeling very proud of himself. "Your extra-special secondary back-up mum." He remembered, in that weird, duplicate history, how it had stung when the other schoolboys said he had two mums. Maybe it'd be different if he heard it somewhere else first, from a smiling face.
"Does that mean I have to mind her?" the boy Sam asked.
"Yes, it does," Sam said judiciously. "Just like your own mum, eh?"
The boy Sam wrinkled his nose. He asked, "Are you Annie's boyfriend, then?"
"No," Sam said. He could see the boy Sam was trying to figure out where he fit in. My Other Mum's Boyfriend was a bit unwieldy a title, but it least it would have made sense of things. "I work with Annie. She's a police constable and I'm a detective inspector." Sam could see that wasn't going to be quite enough. "And she's my friend."
"If she's your friend and she's a girl, that means she's your girlfriend," the boy Sam announced with the impeccable logic of four-year-olds.
"No, it doesn't," Sam said, grinning in spite himself.
"Yes, it does."
"Nope." Sam shook his head. "Annie!" he called out.
Annie put her head out the front door. "Yeah?" she asked.
"You my girlfriend, Annie?" Sam said.
"Lord, no, I'd never let myself be saddled with a nutter like you," Annie answered. She came out of the house to lean on the street lamp.
"Then how did you make him help us move and all," asked the boy Sam, "if he's not your boyfriend?"
"I told him he should be grateful I hadn't had him shipped off to the loony bin, didn't I," Annie said. "You heading back?" she asked Sam.
"Yeah, last load, I think," Sam said. "Do you want to come along, make sure I've got everything?"
"I suppose I'd better," said Annie. "Go on back in the house, Sam. Your mum's unpacking the kitchen. I'm sure she could use your help."
The boy Sam heaved a great sigh and kicked a rock. "Can't I come along, too?"
"Won't be room," Annie said. "We're putting boxes in the back."
"Remember what I said," said Sam, nodding toward Annie.
The boy Sam stuck his tongue out and said, "I don't see why I have to mind her if she's only my secondary, back-up mum."
"Your extra-special secondary back-up mum," Sam reminded him. Annie was blushing. "Off you go."
The boy Sam headed into the house, calling out, "Mum, do I really have to mind Annie?"
Annie took a deep breath, squaring her shoulders. "That wasn't so scary, was it? Though why you decided to put me in the hot seat..."
"He thinks of me as the man who chased off his dad," Sam said quietly.
Annie nodded. "It was for the best, Sam."
"I know," Sam said. "You'll be a much better dad than he was."
"I don't know where you get those funny ideas of yours," said Annie. "And I hope this don't mean you think of me as your dad, or mum, or whatever, because there's crazy and then there's daft, you know."
"Whatever you say, Mum," Sam said brightly.
"Sam!" Annie yelled, smacking him on the shoulder.
Sam ducked his head and grinned at her, part cheeky, part shy. "Look at this way, you can make me mind, now."
"Oh, can I," said Annie. "Get in the car, Sam."
"Yes, Mum," said Sam, opening the door.
"Don't call me that, Sam!" Annie got in as well.
"Yes, Mum."
"If you start this up at the station I'll slap you about harder than DCI Hunt."
"Yes, Mum," Sam sing-songed merrily.
Annie leaned her elbow on the open window and fingered her hair. "Anyone would think you were four and he was the grown-up," she said.
"Yes, Mum," Sam said. After all, she was smiling.
Also on AO3.