The whole "Is it what I like or is it something weird our objectifying culture is doing to my brain?" Oh man do I get that. In both directions. Like, do I not like it because of the messed up stereotypes our culture implies if you like something feminine, and since I don't like those stereotypes I don't like the thing? Or do I like the thing because I feel like somehow I am succeeding in life if someone mistakes me for a "real" girl, so this is not actually about what I genuinely like for myself or...

Or am I giving the toxicness too much brainspace by worrying about it?

Also ye olde "From the outside will it look to people I know like some kind of statement about my gender performance that I don't actually mean, but actually otherwise I would wear it except I do not mean the thing people might think it means."

THAT THING. I hate that thing.

Also I get more neurotic about it whenever I read SF about female dominated cultures and the crap men do in them to be attractive.

Get out of my goddamn head weird cultural issues.