Very interesting post, and quite a bit resonated for me.
Growing up, I absorbed from my mother that....

I learned all of that from my mother too. She was on a perpetual diet, but never lost the weight. I now have a weight obsession because of it.

I have a whole hell of a lot of identity tied up in my hair.

And yes, THIS. My hair is not my natural hair but it means so much to me, my identity, that I will not listen to anyone's suggestions concerning it.